He still plays along, to keep the surprise and magic of Christmas morning.”, “My 9-year-old asked, ‘Is Santa real? You can give your kids things to look forward to by creating family traditions that get you all excited. Get the best of Fatherly in your inbox, What I Wish My Wife Would Say to Me More Often Right Now, According to 12 Husbands. Something went wrong please contact us at support@fatherly.com. (Not all because everyone needs a little mystery at Christmas.) Just as they will tell you if they are ready by asking questions, they can also let you know they are not ready by denying that their friends are telling the truth or refusing to broach the subject. We have seen all the movies. Tell Him That Santa Is YOU. This keeps a beloved character alive, but makes him “not really real.”. She thought about it for a moment and replied that even though she didn’t like that we lied to her about the Tooth Fairy and Santa, she did like staying up and trying to catch them in their magic, so she’s now Santa and the Tooth Fairy for her sister, as she feels I am not convincing enough. We want to provide high-quality content to people who are looking for these topics. The illusion around Christmas is that Santa comes, flies the whole globe and pops down chimneys even where they don't exist. It’s OK if the answer is no.’ I told him no, that it was Mom and Dad filling the stockings and buying the presents, but he is real in the sense that he is a symbol of Christmas, a symbol of giving. Here are 13 ways families have explained Santa to their children (and a few funny reactions to boot): “My oldest is 9 and asked me this year if Santa was real. He said he felt that his dad and I were Santa. If you are religious, put more focus on your faith as the reason for the season. Make a Christmas bucket list. Here's How I Learned to (Sort of) Keep My Cool on the Sidelines. Just like Harry Potter or a cartoon character, Santa is “real” in that he is fun for people and they like to believe in him. But what happens when he wants to have a deeper conversation about these other holidays? I love you. But on the other hand, you don’t want to be responsible for ruining the most wonderful day of the year. There is nothing about option two that I find attractive. For many parents, it's downright painful to think that their child has grown out of the Santa years and all the fun that's associated with the belief in Santa and his little elves. I never expected to put as much thought into something that seems so thoughtless. She can often be found in her apartment writing into the wee hours and trying to read a book in peace. I believe in them with all my heart, and I hope you do too. They were all strangers, but had kind hearts. Not sure how to have the talk with your kids. It’s more a punishment tool, than a positive story. Once one of our children had expressed they were no longer a believer in Santa, they were let in on the secret in order to help keep the magic alive for the next sibling. My son Jesse dismissed the notion. I would tell her, she is 11. Get Your Illinois Medical Cannabis Card From Home! Maybe I’m overthinking the whole thing. FEN Learning is part of Sandbox Networks, a digital learning company that operates education services and products for the 21st century. St. Nick does not want identities to be known. Why does Timmy get more toys? Dr. Roberts advises parents to wait for their child to come to them with questions about Santa and his existence rather taking any preemptive action. It’s believing in magic again, even if it’s only for 25 days. One close friend has already informed them that Santa "does not exist." As much as I believe that you should tell your kid the truth, I don’t think this is something we need to sweat over too hard. We take our roles as parents, kids, citizens in our society. I would rather be upfront about it, and take the hit, the disappointment and even the anger rather than be talked about behind my back, lose the management of the information and look like a fool. A parent can create some complications if telling a child that Santa is a myth before the child is ready to hear it. In fact, the fantasy can genuinely add to the enjoyment. It’s OK if the answer is no.’ I told him no, that it was Mom and Dad filling the stockings and buying the presents, but he is real in the sense that he is a symbol of Christmas, a symbol of giving. It has worked well so far. Yet growing up while knowing the truth about Santa didn’t destroy the magic of Christmas. I mean, I believed in Santa as a kid — however, I did figure out at a fairly young age that he wasn’t real. One of the sub-plots of the movie is that those who "still believe" can hear the tinkling sounds of Santa's sleigh bells, and that those who no longer believe, can't. For me, it was Miss Abrahamson's second-grade classroom at Cumberland School, with a couple of boys angrily denouncing to other students that Santa was a fake. Told him it’s mostly for the little kids and makes the holiday fun.” ― Anne Tink Flores, “I told my children Santa is real, but not in the way that we think of as real. Truth be told, I didn’t make a big deal about Santa with him when he was really little. I said, ‘But that does not make Daddy or me Santa. That is definitely something to keep in mind when deciding to tell him that Santa is not real. After a few blinks, he just started crying. Should I Tell My Child the Truth About Santa? Family life Share is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to Amazon.com. Santa Claus was born almost 2,000 years ago, only a few hundred years after Jesus. So yes, we put the presents in your stockings, but we are not Santa.’, We also talked about the history of Santa (he’s my history buff) and he handled it all really well.”. "He does not exist for HER because she no longer believes," he let me know. He said if they weren’t eaten, then he would know Santa wasn’t real. I can have it now because you are getting to be grown up. Telling Kids The Truth About Santa: My Open Letter to My 11-Year Olds My kids are older and they have a bombardment of friends who "know," and are eager to tell them the truth about Santa. I wanted to gush out in sentimental sobs, until the thought crossed my mind... "Wait a minute, bub, aren't you the dude planning on how he is going to tell his kids that there is NO Santa. On the contrary, it was fun and magical and it made me happy. When I was two years old my parents told me that Santa Claus didn’t exist. "My eight-year-old has come home saying he’s been told Father Christmas isn’t real. Teaching them to give is better for them! Yes, and the argument I use is this: Christmas is going to be exciting and fun and enjoyable whether kids know the truth about Santa or not. Last year, he started talking about Santa bringing presents and I went along with it. As the holidays approach, parents who celebrate Christmas might see their kids starting to doubt one major part of the gift-giving holiday: Santa Claus. Hi guys. Columnist, Radio Host, Gay Dad and Activist. My kids are in their 20s now and if you ask them, they will proudly say they believe in Santa.”, “My oldest was 8 and got curious so he started to press for information. “I had the talk with my daughter about the spirit of giving and becoming a Santa herself. 5.) My standard response for these 9- and 10-year-olds is, ‘If you believe in Santa, he believes in you.’ It seems to work. All up until and through Christmas morning the older ones were so excited that they got to play Santa! As I said, I cannot confirm or deny who that person is or how they operated as an agent of St. Nick. And it’s something they can say to a friend who might try and spoil Santa for them.”, n the end, I asked her if she enjoyed it while it lasted and if she felt we should continue the tales for her little sister who’s 2. Sa'iyda Shabazz is a writer and mother to one. After telling him it was a choice to believe or not to believe, and asking him, ‘What do you think and feel about it?’ he responded that he thought it was pretend. He wrapped it up with a very gentle, ‘Thank you for telling me the truth about Santa, Mommy. Research shows that kids who are lied to by their parents are more likely to lie themselves so it is always a good idea to tell the truth if possible. He lives in the thoughts and the hearts of everyone who does something selfless for another person. I'm a Super-Competitive Dad. They imagine different kind of sleighs that he arrives in, who the reindeer are, and what elves really look like. My mom let my dad write the gift tags that year, and my dad has very distinct handwriting. “My then 10-year-old asked during his younger brother’s karate class. Don’t use Santa as a tool for motivating your kid. It is in what we feel, what we imagine and what we give to create love and happiness. Advice from a 12-year-old: What to tell your kids about Santa. He said he felt that his dad and I were Santa. Ben in my class says he's not," how should we respond? My kids are older and they have a bombardment of friends who "know," and are eager to tell them the truth about Santa.